Devotional #13: Overcoming Fear
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.- Psalm 23 (KJV)
Fear is something that grips most cancer patients. After years of battling cancer, I still struggle with “scanxiety” before every MRI scan. Now, when I look back at the few months before my diagnosis of grade 4 glioblastoma (brain cancer), I have realized that I was crippled with fear and panic even before I knew of the tumor growing in my brain. I feared that I would continue suffering from migraines until I became debilitated, which had been the fate of my grandfather. After I decided to move to Texas, about three months before the tumor was discovered, I feared finding a good home for my two cats. I feared leaving my colleagues in a lurch. I feared being able to find employment in Texas. I just feared the future in general. After my diagnosis, my fears turned toward worrying about my family. How would they fare if I didn’t survive? Would I be too much of a burden on them? How will I afford the expensive medical treatments I need? Will my life ever be normal again? In speaking to victims of all kinds of cancers, I have learned that these fears are all too common.
For me, God used the disease to increase my trust in Him. As one example, I was uncertain if I would be able to continue to make payments on my car, so that my mom could drive me to my radiation appointments. Providentially, through a hail storm, God allowed my car to be so dented that it was “totaled,” but still running. As a result, my car loan was paid off and I even received a balance of about $3,000 which went straight to my medical fund. I can tell you example after example of where God has come through for me and other cancer patients. Yet, before I was able to experience these miracles, I had to learn to trust Him. I did not get the “car miracle” until after I prayed God saying, “Lord, you know my need to keep my car. I’m giving this need to you knowing that you care for me and trusting you to provide.” I have learned that faith and trust are the most effective ways to combat fear.
About two years into my cancer journey, I read “The Hiding Place,” which is the true account of a Christian Dutch watchmaker Corrie Ten Boom and her family who courageously hid Jews in their home during the Holocaust. The heroic actions of Corrie and her family resulted in Corrie’s father dying shortly after his arrest by the Gestapo in 1944. Without knowing of their father’s death, Corrie and her sister Bestie were sent to the Ravensbrück concentration camp, where both sisters would witness and suffer unspeakable acts of cruelty, and where Bestie would ultimately die. To bolster her faith, God gave Corrie an amazing gift while she was interned—a message that every Jew that was hiding in her house was safe in spite of the Gestapo’s raid. Corrie’s story is known world-wide as a fantastic example of heroism, faith, and forgiveness. However, in reading this in the middle of my cancer journey, I was more struck by Corrie’s ability to overcome fear than anything else. I’m certain Corrie was terrified when the Gestapo stormed her home, when she entered the concentration camp, when she saw her sister get severely ill, and every time she witnessed the horrific treatment of her fellow prisoners. In reading more about Corrie, I was struck by a quote of her’s, “Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God.” Indeed Corrie had learned to trust God even in the midst of the most extreme evil imaginable.
I started to reflect on examples in the Bible of reactions of fear. There are several. The most notable of which is Peter’s denial of Christ as told in Luke 22:54-62. Peter, who was Christ’s closest disciple, who had declared Jesus to be the Messiah before anyone else, and who cut of the ear of a Roman soldier arresting Christ only hours before, denied Christ three times the evening before Christ’s crucifixion. I’m sure Peter was fearful of being whipped, mocked, imprisoned and even crucified alongside his Messiah. Peter, however, forgot the a critical lesson Christ taught him, that is told in Matthew 14:22-23. One windy night on the Sea of Galilee, while the disciples were in a boat, Christ approached them walking on the water and cried out to them, “Take courage! It is I,” Christ said, “Don’t be afraid.” Peter, ever faithful, got down off the boat and walked on the water toward Christ, assured of Christ’s protection. But, when the winds picked up, Peter started to doubt and began to sink. After Jesus pulled Peter out of the waters, He asked Peter, “You of little faith, why did you doubt?” The key to combatting fear, as I have come to learn is by learning to better trust God.
Nineteenth century Scottish preacher, Alexander MacLaren puts it this way, “Faith, which is trust, and fear are opposite poles. If a man has the one, he can scarcely have the other in vigorous operation. He that has his trust set upon God does not need to dread anything except the weakening or the paralyzing of that trust.”
I am certain that Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego were fearful of being thrown in the fiery furnace when King Nebuchadnezzar ordered the citizens of Babylon to worship a false god in the image of a statute. However, the three displayed what is tremendous courage, arising from their faith and trust in God. Boldly, the three told King Nebuchadnezzar, “If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand.” Indeed, God Himself did deliver them from the furnace so that their clothes were not even singed. Daniel 3:13-30 (NIV.) In my own life, these lessons have proven true. When you feel gripped with fear, try praying and asking God to increase your faith and trust in Him to see you through.
For Additional Study & Discussion
1. When in your life were you the most afraid? What did you do to calm your fears? What was the result?
2. Can you think of a time when God taught you to put greater trust in Him?
3. Read the account of Moses parting the Red Sea in Exodus 14:10-28. How does the trust and faith of Moses compare with that of the Israelites? How did God bless Moses’ trust and faith. What did the Israelites learn from this experience?